It never fails. When stuff seems to be going really good, something always comes up to put me right back where I seem to belong. I’ve gotten lots of good news lately. Good job changes, moved into a great new apartment, and about to celebrate 5 years sober when I turn 32. I wake up this morning to get thrown something from left field. I can’t say it wasn’t fully expected. I always knew this particular part of my life would reach a precipice one day. Unfortunately, it hit a bit harder than I expected.
Suicide has been a hot topic lately. More so than in past years. A staggering number of celebrities have taken their lives over the last couple of years and it has since put suicide at the front of conversations again. Because of this, you have the inevitable blaming of the victim themselves. I would say often times it is a result of lack of knowledge of mental illness, but I can resoundingly say it is 100% the result of not knowing anything about mental illness or suicide. This extends to even those who have a loved one who died by suicide. Just because it affected you, it doesn’t mean you understand it. Therefore you have no place to blame the victim. It’s paramount to blaming the victim of a sexual assault. Let me explain before you jump on me for the comparison.
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A while back, November more precisely, I decided to take an exit from Facebook. This was a decision as a result of quite a bit going on in my family and in the world as a whole. Facebook became an overwhelming negative in my life. One that took its toll on me. I can’t say it was anyone elses fault, because my perceptions of events are my own and I let a lot get to me. I am human. However, I decided to remove that aspect of my life to hopefully better myself.
I felt the need to share after seeing many disappointing replies to comments lately in a group I participate in on facebook in regards to programs that can assist in sobriety. Please keep in mind that this is my personal experience with AA and is not indicative of every other person who chose not to follow AA’s program.