Iâve been taking a lot of time to reflect on the last 685 days of myÂ sobriety, and as I near the two year mark I am seeing how far I have actuallyÂ come. I donât know about you, but major life changes make me reflect on where IÂ am in my life and how I got there. The good thing about my reflections in theÂ last nearly two years is that I am seeing the positive situations I have foundÂ myself in, instead of the old drunk Ronnie who ended up in very bad situationsÂ in life.
In the last near two years I have started my own small business, grown myÂ personal passion of dog rescue work, rekindled an almost lost relationship,Â maintained a job I absolutely love (dog training) and built so many newÂ relationships with so many people. I was being the real me, the Ronnie whoÂ wasnât tied down by alcohol. My world has opened up exponentially and I haveÂ done things I never could have done while I was drinking.
On the verge of another major life change, the second cross country move in aÂ year, I am reevaluating me and where I am and what I need to do to be an evenÂ better Ronnie when I start my third year of sobriety. In the last 685 days, IÂ can honestly say I havenât gone a single day without thinking about the drink.Â But, the way I handle it has changed. I reflect on how I overcame the last urgeÂ and how I could use that the next time.
Reflecting on what it has taken to get you to a point in your life, whether itÂ be bad or good, will help you learn, grow and mold your future actions into onesÂ that will help you grow stronger. I will make no illusions, the last two yearsÂ of my life have been some of the hardest ones in my entire life. I had toÂ consciously think about every single move I made in my life. Not like when I wasÂ drinking and just let everything happen around me. I really had to be involvedÂ in my life.
Sure, there are many things that I would have done differently if I would haveÂ known then what I know now, but thatâs life, we learn from our mistakes and doÂ it better the second time around. But, reflecting on what you have done does notÂ mean you have to wallow in self-pity or regret decisions. Reflecting allows youÂ to see the error of your ways and improve upon them. It also allows you to see
what you did right and the positive things that have happened in your life.
I am reminded of a scripture when I am reflecting on my life;
The wisdom of the prudent is to give thought to their ways, but the folly of fools is deception.
By being self-aware, we are able to grow. By disregarding our life and our past,Â we are basically saying we donât want to grow or learn from our mistakes. ByÂ being sober, we can clearly see our past, good and bad, and use it as a tool forÂ our future. You canât achieve this without reflecting on your past. This doesÂ not mean dwell and obsess over it, it simply means use what you have and whatÂ you know to be the better person you want to be. I have, and it has been workingÂ pretty well for me.
I see myself as a respectable person who has grown from his bad decisions in theÂ past and used them to make better ones in the future.
Here is a lovely poem by Michelle Tetley about reflecting on your life:
Take time to stop today
Take time to stop a while
Reflect on how life changes
Then take the time to smile
Know that as the days go by
These things that challenge you
Will one day just be memories
Of times you have gone through
Look back now on yesterday
And all you have achieved
Recognize the strengths youâve gained
The blessings youâve received
One day in the future
You will think about today
Youâll see just how these challenges
Have helped you on your way